


Last Words

by Katrinathe1st



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Gen, Irondad, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Poor Peter, Precious Peter Parker, the angst is real
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 21:21:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18646339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katrinathe1st/pseuds/Katrinathe1st
Summary: ENDGAME SPOILERS.Peter hadn't gotten to say goodbye. He hadn't even heard Tony speak to him. Didn't know his last words. All he knew was that he was gone, and he was never coming back.Aka: Peter's thoughts during Tony's death and funeral, and how Pepper Stark tries her best to tell him what Tony never had the chance to say.





	Last Words

**Author's Note:**

> MAJOR ENDGAME SPOILERS AHEAD.

Peter’s mind was a jumble of emotions. He felt exhilarated, terrified, and excited all in one, and he couldn’t quite decipher which one was appropriate for the occasion. Not that he had any time for ciphering his feelings. He barely had time enough to stay alive.

To him, the past 24 hours have been a lifetime. Not only has he fought a battle alongside Tony freaking Stark, but he also died. In Tony’s arms. Only to be brought back what to him was an instant later (five years? That couldn’t be right.) to fight an even crazier battle alongside more heroes than Peter even knew existed. 

But of course, what did they matter to him when he didn’t even know them. Mr. Stark was the one he needed to see. He needed to tell him he was okay and that he didn’t have to worry anymore. If it had been five years… 

Peter couldn’t imagine what Tony had gone through. Had he carried the guilt that Peter knew he’d carry? Or had he taken his last words seriously? 

Ponder this he could not, for he was a little busy… ah, trying not to die. 

But he had found Mr. Stark. For a second between dodges and punches. They’d hugged. It’d been nice. He felt a little better. 

A boom in the distance snapped him out of his concentration momentarily. Just in time for an alien to get the best of him.

A large fist met his face. Although he could feel the blood fill his mouth, he couldn’t taste it. His other senses were going haywire with warning signs, while Karen was buzzing in the background of his suit like a siren. He could barely hear her, since his mask was gone. 

He punched the alien and spun to grab the guy behind him, only to have his hand meet empty air. Pulling back in horror, he watched as the alien faded before his eyes, nothing but dust left to the mercy of the wind.

He backed up, stunned. His senses did not dim. If anything, they sharpened. He wouldn’t- he would not- go again. This couldn’t be happening. 

He spun around, looking desperately for any sign telling him that history wasn’t repeating itself. Only hours- maybe not even that long- since he’d gotten back. He bit his cheek in silent terror.

Then, he paused. But it wasn’t the fact that none of the heroes were fading that caught his attention. It was something far worse.

Tony.

He didn’t even pause to think. Didn’t hesitate a moment before flinging himself down the rubble and across the fallen concrete. Across fallen comrades and dusting aliens alike. He shoved past people who only stared, unmoving, as if they didn’t realize what Ton- Mr. Stark had just done-. 

Because Peter could feel it. He could feel the energy vibrating from Tony’s body. Could feel as it grew weaker. 

He almost fell when he landed at Tony’s feet. Scrambling, he clumsily grabbed at his armor. “Mr. Stark.” 

He tried to catch Tony’s gaze. He waited to hear him say something like, “Yeah, kid, I’m fine, get off me spiderling.” but instead… Tony didn’t even look at him. Peter had to forcefully grab Tony’s cheek and turn his head, and still, Tony stared straight through him, as if he didn’t actually see him.

“M-mr. Stark… we did it, Mr. Stark.” Peter was desperate now, and his voice did nothing to hide it. He was well aware of the state Tony’s arm was in. He could sense that his armor was hiding most of the damage. And with Tony’s heart…

The tears were coming in torrents before he even realized he was crying. His voice grew thicker. “Mr. Stark- no, Mr. Stark we won. Mr. Stark-” Someone grabbed his arm and pulled him away, but all he could see were Tony’s dazed eyes. They slowly followed Peter as he was pulled away, until they settled on Pepper who took his place.

Peter felt hollow. His senses disappeared in a rush of nothing. He almost felt dead again. He nearly wished he was. 

He blabbered something more, nearly incoherent. “Sorry- Tony. Tony-” Someone was pulling him into their arms. He didn’t really care who it was, because those arms were strong and offering the comfort he needed. He hid his face against the leather armor and cried. He could hear Pepper, could hear Tony’s shallow breathing. He couldn’t tear himself away from the scene. He tried to focus on the person holding him; tried to focus on their heartbeat, but he couldn’t. He just… he couldn’t.

He looked up when Pepper started crying. He turned his head, just as the arc reactor sputtered out, and dimmed. 

Tony’s hand fell.

And Peter choked on a sob. He fought whoever was holding him, suddenly angry. Why wasn’t anyone doing anything!? They were just- just watching him die. Watching him after he’d sacrificed everything-.

While the arms holding him were strong, they were still no match for Peter. He tore lose of their grip and crumpled to his knees, shaking with grief. He crawled to Pepper’s side and grabbed Tony’s hand in pure desperation. The hand was nothing but dead weight, but he took no notice. He grappled the wrist, sobbing as he tried to find any signs of a pulse. 

Even if there’d been one he wasn’t sure he’d find it. He was a mess, his spidey senses were exhausted. He was exhausted.

Hands stilled his sloppy attempts. Looking up through his tears, he saw Pepper. She was crying too. He’d never seen her cry before.

“He’s gone, Peter.” She whispered.

He stared at Tony’s face. At his dull eyes. He’d never heard his voice. He didn’t even know what Tony’s last words were. He hadn’t said goodbye-

From that moment, Peter cried no more. It was like… any will to show emotion had been sucked out of him. He moved in a daze. He watched as Tony was carried by Steve and Rhodey, with Pepper following holding Tony’s hand. He let himself be led out of the battle zone by a woman he did not know. He let himself be put in a car and driven to Queens. But even when Aunt May hugged him, he still did not cry. 

Two days later was the funeral. And all Peter could do was watch as any hopes that Tony was coming back drifted away. He was gone. And, in a way, he’d taken a little piece of Peter with him. 

Was this what Mr. Stark had had to live with for five years? This… empty feeling in the pit of your stomach? The guilty feeling that it could’ve been fixed, had he done something different..? 

He didn’t realize he was still standing at the dock when everyone was beginning to return to the house, until a little hand grabbed his. He looked down into the face a little dark haired girl. Her eyes were wide, her mouth turned down. He thought he saw little tear streaks on her cheeks.

“I’m Morgan.” She said simply. Peter couldn’t bring himself to smile, but he nodded and gave her hand the slightest squeeze. 

“I’m Peter.” He returned.

He looked up when Pepper whispered Morgan’s name. She let go of Peter’s hand and went to grab Pepper’s skirt. 

“Hello, Peter.” Pepper said quietly. Her voice didn’t shake, but he could see the pain in the her eyes. 

“Hi.” He said, just as quietly. There weren’t many words to be said. 

Finally, she cleared her throat. “I see you met Morgan.” 

He looked up, silent.

A lone tear slipped down her cheek. “Tony picked the name.” 

It dawned on him. This… this was Tony’s kid. This was the kid everyone kept mentioning. He’d never heard her name. All he’d heard was “What about Tony’s kid?” “The poor kid. She doesn’t know.” “She didn’t get to say goodbye.” 

He sucked in a sharp breath and looked back at Morgan. She stared back, and it was then that he realized- she had Tony’s eyes.

“Hello, Morgan.” Peter whispered. He looked back to Pepper. “How…” He cleared his throat. “How are you doing… with all of this?” 

To anyone else, it would seem a stupid question. How well would anyone be holding up, if their husband had died only two days prior? But to Peter… he wanted confirmation. He wanted to know if he was the only one carrying this guilt.

Pepper looked back at the lake, then back to Peter, as if that was an answer to his question. She looked so tired. So worn. And yet, she smiled, albeit sadly. “How are you doing, Peter?” 

He almost crumbled, but he held himself together. He cleared his throat instead. “I…” What could he say? That he’s had nightmares every night since? That he hasn’t gotten more than two hours of solid sleep? Instead, he said the first things that came to his mind. “I don’t even know his last words. I don’t know what he would’ve said to me if he’d had the chance.” 

There was peaceful silence, filled only by the slight hum of the others talking quietly at the house. Morgan took that moment to pull away and run up to the house, where she grabbed at Happy’s hand. 

Pepper lifted her chin, and Peter could tell she was trying her hardest not to cry. He suddenly wanted to hug her, to tell her it would be okay. Second to May, she was the closest to a Mom he’d ever have.

“He’d say he was proud of you. And that he’s sorry he didn’t say he loved you. Because he did, Peter. You were the son he never had. You were his first kid.” She reached forward and rested her hand on his shoulders when she saw they began to shake. Biting his lip, he looked away, fearing he might fall apart if he looked at her any longer. 

“You were the reason he tried to reverse the snap.” She continued, her voice hitching. “He loved you like you were his own kid. He even told Morgan she had an older brother.” 

Peter hugged himself, fighting the urge to sob, right there and then, in front of Pepper and whoever else was watching. Which could be anyone, given the amount of superheroes on the front porch. 

“’I am Ironman’.” Pepper whispered. “Those were his last words.” 

She hugged him, and after a few moments asked if he would be okay. He said he would be, and she left.

Peter stood there, staring at the sparkling blue water. The sky was clear, and the sun was just setting. Peaceful. 

But his heart was heavy. Tony had done it all for him... his guilt was well deserved. 

So Peter cried.

**Author's Note:**

> Endgame destroyed me. I'll never be over it. *cries*  
> (btw, you can also find this fic on my tumblr under the username fan-writer02.)


End file.
